Do We Have to Be THAT Good?

Sharon J Cole

Do we have to be THAT good?


Like, Perfect??


Do you notice an emphasis on perfection in our world?


Being “The Best”?


Is that Good, or Bad?


What if our children aren’t “the best” in their sports?  Or “the best” in their school work?  Or … in the mirror they look in?  Would they still have our approval?


How about Excellent?  Well, yes.  Excellent is a good thing!  But what is it measured against?  I think it’s Best when measured against ourselves.  In games/sports; In school work, and In the mirror.


None of us will ever achieve “Perfection”.


I’ll never be able to get my “Today’s To Do List” done every day.  I’m really happy when I finish the whole list occasionally.


Do we put too much pressure on ourselves (and our children) to be better than everybody else?


Health and wellness are a process.  Sometimes it’s slow.  But this life isn’t a sprint to the finish line.  It’s a lifelong marathon…


The truth is we’re all imperfect.  Will we ever eat “perfectly right” food; exercise perfectly every day; drink the perfect amount of water for our body weight daily… will we ever be perfect at interacting with others in our life?


What would that “perfect” person look like, anyway? 


What would “perfect” actually be?


Sounds pretty unrealistic, doesn’t it?


How can we believe we could ever actually attain “perfection” in any area of our lives?


And Sometimes…some of us actually think we’ve arrived in that state, so much so that we consider ourselves in a position to judge others.  And by whose standard? … Well… ours, of course!!  (Smile)


That position could be pretty destructive to our relationships—we would actually be blind to seeing who we, actually, really are.  And also blinded to the good in others.  Or the Greatness in them.


If we’re being critical of other because they aren’t (our idea of) perfect, they pick up that feeling—it transmits from one person to another.  So their self-esteem suffers.

And when we’re critical of ourselves in this same way, doesn’t it give us that same feeling?  Allowing our self-esteem to sink?  Yes.  For Sure.


So whatever we’re trying to accomplish, our chances—and the chances of others around us—have lowered.


It is great to have standards.  High standards.  And Yes.  We feel good when we accomplish great things (as we should).  And the better we do things, the better we feel (as we should).

          But the Danger is in not accepting “Good” as being good enough.  Or not accepting “Excellent” as being good enough.


We should absolutely do our best at everything we do.  But when you feel yourself stressing; begin to see increases in ourselves criticizing ourselves, or criticizing others, it’s probably time to take a closer look at how much we’re expecting of ourselves in the way of perfection.


I was raised to believe perfection was the goal.  But if you spent your whole life plagued by feelings that you just didn’t measure up, is that worth the pursuit of perfection?


I’m taking a course online, and I assure you, I’m learning my work is better “done” than “perfect”!


I’ve learned in the last few years that a good way of thinking, to keep yourself from being “frozen” would be as you travel along your path toward your goal, to tip your goal a little sideways, to add a little “Imperfect” to your project.  I’ve tried this, and had much better results in the project I was working on.  I’d welcome a little bit of imperfection at the beginning, then be pleased with the overall result—knowing there was some imperfection there so I did not feel the pressure of making it perfect.


Gary Vayderchuk says that beneath the “perfectionist” title is Fear.  As I consider this slant, I’m inclined to agree with him.  And Fear paralyzes, which Perfectionism also paralyzes, so they could go together very well.


Also, another thought could be: is trying to be perfect, just trying to say “me too” in a better way?  “Me too”, as in going along with the crowd—would it feel better to think of a new and different thought instead?


And, Forbes Magazine says perfection is boring—that it’s our imperfections that make us unique.  I think I agree with that too.


I think we do need to get comfortable stretching ourselves and being “imperfect” and unique.


Being perfect—at anything—is not attainable, and it holds our brain back from thinking outside the box to do new and different things that are uniquely us—a Relaxed Us—instead of up-tight, trying to be perfect.


There are, also, studies that show that the pursuit of perfection leads to anxiety, depression and other mental health issues.  I believe that, and I’d say let’s don’t do that…


So. Let’s Let it Go!! And go toward the different things we Really do want in our lives. 


Let’s Enjoy being Imperfect!


Let’s Be Our Own Unique Selves!


No telling what kind of world we can create!


Thank you for reading… Contact me if I can help you in any way.


Until next time…




Meet Sharon

Sharon is the founder of Where is Your Calm, and is dedicated to the wellness of every client she has. She graduated from the Functional Medicine Coaching Academy in 2019 and has been doing group coaching and individual coaching since then.

Sharon is a caring haven for people of all ages to address their overwhelm and overwork, helping them to improve their life with small changes in their lifestyle and nutrition habits. She regularly attends classes and training to keep up with the most innovative practices to address her clients' needs.  

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