Do you live "by default"?

Sharon J Cole

Do you live “by default”?      


Or By Design!


Do you live on “auto pilot”?


10 Years go by in a Blink!


What kind of life do you want?


If you live intentionally, with courage, you’ll be closer to that life.

If you live “by default”, you won’t.


If where you are in ten years is not important to you, this won’t matter.


If you choose where you want to go, you’ll be less likely at the end of you life, to have regrets.


Some of the regrets people have in their final moments:

●       I wish I would have had the courage to live life true to myself, and not so much what others expected of me.

●       I wish I had worked less and enjoyed more things;

●       I wish I had had the courage to express my feelings;

●       I wish I had stayed in touch with my friends;

●       I wish I had let myself be happier


We might need to think, do I need to reconsider my habits?

What helps my body and mind to be stronger?

What hinders my thoughts and my good intentions?

Does clutter interfere with my “living”?




If you’re focused pretty much totally on your “To Do” list, and your greatest concentration is on completing tasks, it’s so easy to just let your “life” run on its own.  It’s been doing a good job, right?  Well, yes… but…


You will appreciate your “living” so much more if you can learn to cultivate mindfulness so you can appreciate your presence more.  It will give you more peace in your everyday life; it will reduce your stress; and it will improve your relationships.


From scrolling on social media to multi-tasking at work, it’s so easy to just let our “life” slide by without even realizing what’s going on in our life.




Here are a few things to think about, that may be able to help you:


1.     Technology has a constant pull on us.  We are bombarded all day long (and longer) with notifications, email and social media updates.  Plus …Work!  Can we disconnect for a bit?  It takes real intention.  We live in a world that in many cases, relies on that technology heavily.  In order to reconnect to our “present”, sorry, but we need to disconnect from the distractions.  Maybe set aside a specific time of day to shut everything off for a time—consider an hour.

a.      Consider putting your phone on airplane mode for a certain amount of time during the day, and at night.

b.     While waiting in line, or at a doctor’s office, etc., “decide” ahead of time that you won’t “scroll”.  Decide to just pay attention to your surroundings instead.

c.      Decide that your meals, even quick ones on the run, will not be spent scrolling on social media.  Your eating wil be more relaxing, and you will actually taste your food.  Your digestion will probably be better too.

2.     If you are going to have some “down time”, you can prepare by thinking ahead of time about what you can do.  Doing something with your hands will help.  Hobbies are good; making puzzles; making crafts, baking; these things will help you be present and appreciating where you are and what you are doing.

3.     Take a Walk.  Outside is best if you can.  Fresh air makes you feel better; walking is probably the best thing you can do for your body and your brain.  It’s good for your heart, your brain, your blood, and your mullygrubs!

4.     Take some time for you.  Lots of talk going around about “self care”.  Try some of these:

a.     Be kind to yourself; say good things to yourself.  This is so important!

b.     Have a morning ritual that helps you stay on a good course for the day;

c.      Have an evening ritual that helps your body and mind know it’s getting near time to close those eyes and rest;

d.     Get enough movement in your body to keep all your body’s systems working at their best;

e.      Eat the best food you can;

f.       Try meditating for a few minutes each day;

g.     Have a priority to spend some time relaxing every day;

h.     Go to bed about the same time every night so you can get enough rest;

All these things help you be more present in whatever part of the day you are in.

5.     Talk to people.  Outside your comfort zone? Consider it anyway.  You will be amazed at how people are so ready and welcoming for someone to look them in the eye and acknowledge them.  It’s amazing.

6.     Make special efforts to plan regular time with your family and/or friends that give opportunity for everyone involved to enjoy the experience.  You will be spending your time actually present, naturally.

7.     Try doing something different or new to you.  Cold plunge? Camping trip? Something unusual or that has a little risk to it will definitely put you into being fully present in the moment.  Challenge yourself.


Try to just focus on the present in where you are in the moment. 

You can cultivate this as a habit.  Living in the present brings with it many benefits.  You will feel more calm.  More joy.  Your life will be more fulfilled.  You may even discover excitement in your life that you never knew was there.

I have lived a good part of my life on autopilot. I’ve missed so much “living” by living too fast, filling up my time with “rush” from one thing to another, to make sure I got it all done. We can get by with that for a time, and sometimes it truly can not be helped. But our lives were not meant to live that way. Our lives were meant to enjoy. To truly live in the moment we find ourselves in.


I hope if these strike a chord with you, that you can make some changes and enjoy your life and your family and that you have a good understanding of why you are here on this earth.


When you live on “autopilot”, you miss your life!


Let’s LIVE our LIFE!


Thank you for reading.  Let’s Enjoy!



Meet Sharon

Sharon is the founder of Where is Your Calm, and is dedicated to the wellness of every client she has. She graduated from the Functional Medicine Coaching Academy in 2019 and has been doing group coaching and individual coaching since then.

Sharon is a caring haven for people of all ages to address their overwhelm and overwork, helping them to improve their life with small changes in their lifestyle and nutrition habits. She regularly attends classes and training to keep up with the most innovative practices to address her clients' needs.  

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