This Life is Real

Life has many curves and turns, and some pauses.  Our time on this earth doesn’t usually stay the same very long.

Life in my little space in this world has had a lot of sadness lately, along with some fun too.  All of it is part of our lives on this earth now and again. 

Our close neighbor and fellow church member was at church on a Sunday a couple of weeks ago, and joined others in special prayer for two women in our congregation who were ill.  That afternoon after a wonderful time with her family, she left this earth suddenly and unexpectedly, to enter the afterlife.

She was a rock to her family; the center of their family’s lives.  Such a loss for her family, and also for our church.

We’ve had another church member pass away after several months of illness; one of our neighbor’s father passed away after a short illness.  A cousin passed away after a long illness. 

Another cousin who had been ill and suffering for a long time, passed away.  The next day, one of his granddaughters lost the father of her children in an accident. 

It seems like sadness after sadness.

That’s lots of people that I know who have left this world in the past 2-3 weeks.  We have lots of people around us that are desperately hurting.  People on this earth need each other.  We’re here to help each other and support each other, as needs come up.

In the South, we usually take food to the family during these times.  It shows love and shows them we care.  It makes a difference.  It helps them.

I believe we are expected to have relationships with those around us.  I think when we try to help those relationships grow and flourish, we’re blessed, along with blessing the other person.

Did you know that good relationships help you to be healthier, and actually help you live longer?  It’s true.  People with good relationships in their lives have less depression, less illnesses, and less chronic disease.

How could we strengthen our relationships?  One simple thing, speak to people.  Sometimes speaking to people is awkward.  If we just give a friendly greeting, it helps everyone to just overcome that feeling.  It doesn’t matter how you start.  It grows your circle of people to love.

A second simple thing, check back in with those people.   In business you would call that “follow up”.  In regular life, you can just call it checking on these people in your circle.  Just checking in to see how they are, or what they’ve been up to.  You can just say something like, they were on your mind so you thought you’d check in with them.

A third thing is to spend some time with them.  Meet them for a cup of coffee, or at a farmer’s market, or lunch.  Or anything.

To improve your relationships at home, think of things your spouse or children would like to eat… or what they’d enjoy doing… some small thing that would be special to them.  Then treat them to that.  And Love doing it.

Don’t sacrifice yourself to the point of giving more than you have—at least not long-term.  Put boundaries that protect yourself, and follow them for the most part.   If you deplete all your own energy, you’ll lose yourself, and you’ll be of no value.  You can find a way.  Love them… and Love yourself.

If you can love and enjoy this whole process, you’ll gain energy.  And you’ll actually have more joy in your life.  So relax, and enjoy the process.  Let it feel good to you, in some way.

***********

So, what about the sadness…?  Well, God tells us He is with the broken-hearted.  We really must take that to heart.  The hurt and the sadness are there, and there’s no getting around it.  The pain is unbearable.  But we can bear it.  Somehow.

One step in front of the other… get through this moment… then the next… moment by moment.  Then another day… somehow, with God’s help, we can get through it.  Then the next day.

As one of my cousins said just a couple of days ago after losing her husband of over 50 years, Life does go on.  It’s hard.  Terribly hard.  But it’s what is in front of us, and the only way to get through it is to go forward.  No detours will work.

Lives are forever changed.  Families are forever changed.  Life is full of curves, and turns, and pauses—and steep hills.  Let God carry you on.  Just place one foot in front of the other… then the next.  Let God take you on. 

We don’t know what’s on the other side.  And we surely don’t want to stay in the painful spot we are in.  But we can’t get out of it unless we go forward.  As my cousin said… Life goes on.  That’s a painful fact.  It’s also a path toward easing the pain.

********************

In the midst of these sad times, I had an opportunity to go with my daughter to visit my granddaughter, about 3 hours away, for the weekend.  She was putting on a program at the state park where she works, and we were going to watch her in action.  That was a gift for me.  I went.

As soon as her program started, a storm came through.  Vendors scrambled to take down their booths, and get out of the storm.  It was pretty chaotic.  And wet.  We went to the Visitor Center and met the people she worked with while we waited for the rain to slow down.

About 1:30 or so, we were finally able to eat our sandwiches we brought, under a pavilion in the rain.  We were starved, and I’m not very much of a “sandwich person”, but it was a delicious lunch, with rain coming down around us.  Pretty cool, actually.  For me, a different adventure.  I liked it.

We did get to go on a very nice hike, and we enjoyed the rest of the weekend together eating and visiting and doing a little shopping.  It was a treat, for sure, for me.

These are the things we need to build on.  All these things, not just the positive things that happen (which might be easier), but all these things.  They’re all opportunities to build relationships.  People need each other.  We need each other.  We can help each other through hard times.  And through easier times.

Be patient with people.  Overlook them as much as possible—none of us are perfect.  Be kind when you might not feel kindness.  Afterwards, these things usually have rewards.  #1, you’ll be doing the right thing.  #2, the other person may have totally needed your grace in that moment.

Final thought… Love People… we can’t do much of this without Love in our heart.  Don’t neglect your relationships.  Don’t take them for granted.  Build them.  Build them deeply.  They will pay you back—in feeling good, in your health, and in your longevity… Oh! And “your people” will be blessed!

Good relationships make you stronger, more confident… and they’re good for your soul.  This Life is Real.  Let’s live it the very best way we can.

Thank you for reading.

Sharon

Psalm 34:18

The Lord is near to the brokenhearted and saves the crushed in spirit.

I Corinthians 13:4-5

Love is patient, love is kind.  It does not envy.  It does not boast; it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking; it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs.